Terms & Conditions
Effective Date: July 10, 2027
IMPORTANT LEGAL NOTICE
These Terms & Conditions are entirely for entertainment purposes. They create no contract, obligation, duty, cause of action, attorney-client relationship, fiduciary relationship, or other relationship recognizable by any court of competent jurisdiction.
By reading this page, you agree to absolutely nothing.
Now that our disclaimer is out of the way, counsel advises us to proceed.
1. Definitions
For purposes of these Terms & Conditions:
“The Couple” means Adrianna and Lucas.
“Guest” means any person properly invited to attend the Wedding.
“Wedding” means the celebration scheduled for July 10, 2027, together with all associated eating, drinking, dancing, laughing, crying, hugging, questionable song requests, and related festivities.
“Plus-One” means an additional guest expressly included on an invitation and does not mean someone located by Guest shortly before the RSVP deadline.
“Reasonable Hour” shall remain intentionally undefined.
2. Acceptance of Invitation
Invitations are personal, non-transferable, non-assignable, and may not be sold, auctioned, sublicensed, or listed on Facebook Marketplace.
Attendance constitutes evidence that Guest likes Adrianna, Lucas, free food, or some combination thereof.
3. Consideration
In consideration for Guest's attendance, The Couple intends to provide some combination of food, drinks, music, cake, celebration, and memories.
Guest's consideration shall consist of their presence and a good-faith effort to have a lovely time.
The parties stipulate that this constitutes more than adequate consideration.
4. RSVP Obligations
Guests shall RSVP by the stated deadline.
“I thought Adrianna knew we were coming” shall not constitute substantial performance.
Guests who RSVP and later experience a change in circumstances should notify The Couple as soon as reasonably practicable.
5. Additional Guests
Only individuals identified on the invitation are invited.
The doctrines of implied consent, apparent authority, adverse possession, and “but they're really fun” shall not create an entitlement to an additional guest.
6. Dress Code
Guests agree to make a reasonable effort to comply with the dress code described in the Wedding FAQ.
The Couple reserves no right whatsoever to provide fashion advice beyond that point and expressly disclaims liability for any disagreement between Guest and Guest's closet.
7. Food & Beverage
Guests with dietary restrictions or allergies should disclose them when submitting their RSVP.
Guests consuming alcoholic beverages agree to exercise reasonable judgment.
The Couple shall not be held responsible for hangovers, questionable dance moves, excessive confidence, unexpected karaoke performances, or stories beginning with the phrase, “So apparently last night I...”
8. The Dance Floor
Participation on the dance floor is encouraged but not mandatory.
Guests who repeatedly state that they “don't dance” acknowledge that this representation may be challenged upon the playing of the correct song.
No minimum standard of rhythm shall apply.
9. Photography
Guests acknowledge that photographs and video may be taken during the Wedding.
The Couple makes no warranties concerning Guest's facial expression, posture, blinking status, dance technique, or awareness that a camera was pointed at them.
10. Assumption of Emotional Risk
Guest knowingly accepts the possibility of:
Happy tears
Unexpected sentimentality
Excessive hugging
Sore feet
Cake-related overindulgence
Renewed belief in love
Hearing at least one song that was dramatically overplayed sometime between 2005 and 2015
Such risks are inherent to the activity and cannot reasonably be eliminated.
11. Force Majeure
The Couple shall not be responsible for circumstances beyond their reasonable control, including severe weather, transportation disruptions, acts of God, or other events traditionally included in an aggressively drafted force majeure provision.
Weather is specifically advised that it already interfered with Lucas's original proposal plans and is therefore on notice.
12. Dispute Resolution
Any disagreement arising from or relating to the Wedding should first be resolved through good-faith negotiation.
If negotiation fails, the dispute may be submitted to binding Dance-Off Arbitration.
Decisions of the dance floor shall be final and subject to no appeal.
13. Limitation of Liability
To the fullest extent permitted by absolutely imaginary law, The Couple shall not be liable for:
Sore feet
Lost dignity
Emotional reactions to the ceremony
Overconsumption of dessert
Accidental participation in group dancing
Romantic decisions inspired by the atmosphere
Any photographs Guest subsequently wishes did not exist
14. Severability
If any provision of these Terms & Conditions is determined to be invalid, unenforceable, excessively ridiculous, or insufficiently funny, the remaining provisions shall continue in full force and effect.
15. Entire Agreement
These Terms & Conditions constitute the complete and entire joke concerning the legal obligations of Wedding guests and supersede all prior jokes, representations, negotiations, drafts, side agreements, and poorly researched internet templates relating thereto.
16. Governing Principles
These Terms & Conditions shall be governed by the principles of friendship, family, common sense, good humor, and the general proposition that everyone is here to celebrate Adrianna and Lucas.
17. Final Disclaimer
Seriously, none of this is legally binding.
There is no contract.
There are no Wedding Police.
We are lawyers. We couldn't resist.
We love you, we're glad you're here, and we hope you have an incredible time celebrating with us.